 |
TOP FIVE Surprises in the Stimulus Package
By Dan Mahoney
It's a dark and turbulent time for all of us in the midst of this "Great Recession" of ours. Survival Tip #1: Give someone a free online video greeting card, available from your poor friends at LILYDIDIT.com! Tip #2: Count on the surprises in the stimulus package (see below) to do the rest. 1. We're making another Great Lake! 2. Every family to receive: (2) orange $500 bills, (2) beige $100 bills, (2) blue $50's, (6) green $20's and (5) yellow $10's, pink $5's, and white $1's. 3. We the people officially own the Neverland ranch now. 4. Detroit getting 3 billion dollars to 'try and build a car that cries.' 5. Beyonce's ass? INSURED. With trips to our new Great Lake and overnights at Neverland Ranch, everyone’s going to have a kickass summer, but there is one cloud of dismay: next week, Dan Mahoney (aka LDI's Mr. March) delivers his final Top Five List. It's sure to be an emotional list of five-pointed hilarity. Show up on MONDAY the 30th to get your tears jerked and your giggles going.
Back - TOPFIVE Hall of Fame
|
|
 |
|